Japanese robot unemployment reaching crisis levels

We are mere years from when SkyNet becomes self-aware and declares war on humanity. The rise of the machines, like most uprisings, will be sparked by joblessness.

The NY Times today details how the collapse in Japan’s exports has bankrupted the robotics industry and left thousands of metal hands idle. If you squint your eyes, it almost reads like an unwritten Onion headline: “Japanese Robot Unemployment at 30-Year High.” An example:

At a large Yaskawa Electric factory on the southern Japanese island of Kyushu, where robots once churned out more robots, a lone robotic worker with steely arms twisted and turned, testing its motors for the day new orders return. Its immobile co-workers stood silent in rows, many with arms frozen in midair.

Japan -– the country which perfected suicide -– is committing societal seppuku in front of the world. Its population is aging and contracting, and its staggering national debt is more than double the relative size of America’s. And its primary population center –- Tokyo, the world’s biggest city -– sits on top of two major fault lines. We love Japan to death, but it’s hard to envision any scenario other than doom for it.

Robots were going to be Japan’s saving grace. In 30 years, when half its population is comprised of senior citizens, robots would provide the care and assistance work that most rich nations farm out to immigrants. Since newcomers are for some reason still unwelcome in Japan, somebody’s gotta help grandma out of the tub.

But now Japan’s robot nurse, robot pet, robot security guard, and robot gadget-builder are collecting dust, their designs shelved, their designers seeking work abroad.

Meanwhile, America’s robots -– the ones that blow shit up -– are thriving. When the only members of a society with real jobs are the ones who wield the guns, it's time to worry.