WE BEAT MEMPIS NOT OUR GIRLS

For those who have yet to revel in this joyful tussle, check out this scene following UAB's one-point home loss to #1 Memphis. Honestly, this picture is so awesome, it's replaced my daughter on my PC desktop. (Temporarily, okay?)

See the high-res version here and see if you can spot 75 amazing things. Here's a sample:

First you get the charmingly botched sign razzing Robert Dozier for allegedly assaulting his ex-. But that barely touches the genius of this dynamite lady, the greatest sports face-painter in memory:

Black eye, "I DATED DOZIER" tank top? Marry me.

And then you've got this front-row Bubba taking a Memphis pimp-smack while the uniformed police officer just tries to stay out of the way. You couldn't stage this so perfectly if you tried. GIT-R-DONE, champ!

Also, great follow-through by the slapper, no?

Rumors and Rants has a deep breakdown of this fracas, including an impressive count of middle fingers.

Now can we just hand the Pulitzer to this photog and call off the rest of 2008?